If and only if.

The lack of concentration, the lack øf motivation , lack of belief [self belief].
The assumption to hate for the superior being , feeling disregarded by Him.
Favours hidden by He on his account.
Once his creation now a lone soul with no view to a horizon.

Hurtin is understating the surge he has ,
Bloated thoughts, hopes and realities he can't erase , he above either shy or enjoyin he in misery.
Sleepless thoughts, sleepless nights - the fantasies all alike , alike everyday.
Terrible is the idea as this is shaping to be real, a reality he's destined to embrace everyday.

Self pity won't do, neither does the pity of they.
The horizon too blurry, can't master steps ahead without toppling.
He above won't send him a 'her' to help clear this horizon. The faze to hate Him and they grows more vast today than yester.

From complete he's reduced to an aimless ,hopless and desperate lad , he's continually unsure of possible prospects.
No more games no more objectives ,
How the idea of hope flickers off any light of optimism , he hopes no more.
Can't afford the costly price of hope.
The prices too bloated _ he still pays installments of a prior 'hope loan'.

If only he'd hated the idea originally,
If only he hadn't borrowed the 'hope loan' ,
If only the memories and thoughts would rub-off ,
If only He above was as his scripture,
If only the horizon was as clear as his first idea of hope.
Then there would be possibilities of a possible clarity to his horizon.

One.